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Confidence in a box – sharing the joy around

April 17th, 2007 · 4 Comments

Life has sped up so much lately – lots of fingers in lots of pies, lots of lists and things I’d just love to do if only I could find the time.

Of course, the home renovations add significantly to my busyness – probably more than I ever realised they would, having never renovated a house I was living in before. I renovated a rental property with a baby on my hip, but then it was about selling it, not living in it – big difference!

Some meaningful things have been slipping through cracks… like the beautiful post by Chris OwenTake A Bite: Confidence in a Box.

So today I am taking 5 minutes to share this with you.  Chris writes beautifully about the nebulous nature of confidence, and how sharing a little confidence, acceptance and unconditional love is so very important. In Chris’ usual style:

If someone YOU know struggles with low self-esteem, then they are also likely to be struggling with loving themselves.  As a result, finding confidence in their decisions and even in someone else’s compliments to them is a struggle!

They need your unconditional love.  You may not understand HOW they could lack this important element.  They may not be aware enough to explain it to your satisfaction.  So just "build a bridge and get over it".  You, the stronger one, not the one struggling, just need to get used to the fact that you don’t need to know/understand.   

What is critical for you to offer is acceptanceUnconditional love is a love that doesn’t need to understand, doesn’t love despite something (excluding/conditional on certain aspects), but loves WITH all the flaws, foibles, unpleasant parts etc.

Endless unconditional love goes a LONG way to building confidence.   See what a massive gift you could be offering someone you love!

Anne Maybus started it all at The Tall Poppy , and it looks like the beautiful blue confidence-in-a-box box is starting to get around!

Many women suffer from low self-esteem. I know when I went from being an  independant, high-income, in-control-of-my-life executive to a Mum for the first time, my confidence was so low you needed a magnifying glass to find it! And I find a lot of women have a similar experience at some stage of their lives.. confidence is a fragile thing – easily damaged, and it’s a hard road for many of us to restore that confidence in ourselves.

We know we should be more confident. But just knowing about it doesn’t make it so.

Having dear friends who we trust tell us how great we are is a good boost to our confidence… and so I love these meme Anne started, and Chris shared with me.  I’d love to share this beautiful blue box with so many women in my life right now – I’m having a hard time chosing!!


Lisa – my dear sister – this one’s for you! I know you’re lurking out there, reading… now maybe I can encourage you to leave a comment, dear one. You are a priceless treasure, my soul in another body – you deserve the world!

Maryanne - a kindred spirit I have never met – a brilliant writer & a gorgeous caring Mum (sorry, MOM) – here’s to you, my friend!

Marj - the lady who teaches me all the time about customer service, going the extra mile and that it’s the little things that count. You run a wonderful business in Slim Ink, Marj, and I am so pleased you’re joining us regularly in Sanctuary now.

Chris – right back at you, my dear… to a fantastic writer, the best sounding board I could hope for, a warm, giving and generous person who lifts me up higher than I could go alone.

YOU!! To you, beautiful soul, cherished friend, happy woman – I give you this beautiful blue box as a token of my confidence and awe… thank you!

Tags: Noticing Miracles · Wonder Woman

4 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Chris Owen // Apr 17, 2007 at 5:51 pm

    So heartfelt. So exactly what Anne intended!

  • 2 Verna Wilder // Apr 19, 2007 at 12:18 pm

    And you know what’s amazing? We can make a difference in the lives of people we don’t even know and will never see again. Yesterday when I was cracking myself up in the restaurant, a woman and her son walked in and on their way to their table, the woman looked at me sitting there alone smiling to myself, and she said, “You are so pretty sitting there!” And that was that. She went to her table, I finished my salad, we didn’t make eye contact again, but I carried a warm glow with me for the rest of the day simply because someone expressed what she felt in the moment — to a stranger. Wow.

    Makes me want to go out and do the same thing. Want to try it?

  • 3 Marjorie // Apr 28, 2007 at 8:57 am

    My heartfelt thanks Karen for your kind words.

    It is amazing how many women have a lack of self esteem and yet, i look back over my life and i can totally understand how and why!

    i say let us nourish first and foremost in all our young daughters/girls of the world this very important feature of being a woman. To have confidence is to be able to do anything…

  • 4 Anne Maybus // May 27, 2007 at 3:56 pm

    I love your post and I really want to thank you for passing this box of confidence on. It is a passion of mine and I want to see many women get the boost that they need.

    ps. Gorgeous looking site!

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